Today Hot Report

Just when you think Chris Crocker is going to be the only impassioned androgynous male Britney Spears apologist to break through the pop culture glass ceiling, along comes Derrick Barry of “America’s Got Talent.”

This is not Britney Spears, then or now. This is a 24-year-old sexy beast named Derrick Barry. Photo by Nick San Pedro/Derrick Barry MySpace page

Barry, 25, a Spears impersonator, performed Brit’s school girl fantasy, “…Baby One More Time” Tuesday night during the first episode of the live “Talent” performance semifinals.

The audio was bad and it was too obvious he was lip syncing, but he was a lot more invested in that than Spears has been in any stage performance in years.

This is my first experience with this show. Last night we saw 10 acts from the top 40. According to host Jerry Springer, only five of them can go through to the next round. I’m not convinced Las Vegas needs a Britney Spears impersonator (does it already have one?), but there’s no denying the guy is one hot chick.

Actually, I guess there is some denying it. Judge Piers Morgan has it in for poor Derrick.

Piers Morgan: “Personally I don’t think grown men should wear schoolgirl outfits and pretend to be Britney Spears.”

(Boos from the crowd.)

Sharon Osbourne: “Sharon, Derrick darling I just love you. I love you. I love Britney. I think there’s room for two Britneys. You’re fabulous. Just love you and I love that lovely flat tummy of yours. God, I’m jealous.”

David Hasselhoff: “I’m questioning my sexuality…” (Derrick: “All over again.”). “… there is an audience for you. …”

(Hasselhoff stands up and bares his butt, which reads “Back Hoff.”) “This is for you, Piers!”

Love it!